Obsession is it?

It comes with a pang of hatred, I see her with him, touch his hands, kiss his lips and….. Oh Lord am I human, that I want to cut every bit of hers that touched him?

The scenes could change and sequence could vary, but each time I feel the same blood flow up my legs and collect in a pit in my heart, that pains, pains so much and I close my eyes to see that image, I push it away, but it comes back from like a flash, and leave me boiling, fuming in rage.

I have not seen or met her and does it even matter? it is in the past, even I have skeletons in my closet, but they seem nothing. I cannot bear the thought of some other eyes looking at him, some other lips lust for him, hands wanting to touch him……so much so I cannot share him even with his family, his smiles should be only for me, he should only share moments for me, how can he laugh with them when he says he belongs to me?

How can he sleep in the room that does not have me around? how can he walk on the roads and let people look at him? I hate the cigarette smoke that he takes in, as it touches the insides of him that I cannot reach, how can he talk to strangers and let them hear his voice? How come the air around him touches him all the time and not me….why can’t I bear these thoughts…..why?

I want to be the food that satisfies his hunger, the water that takes his thirst away, blanket that gives him warmth, the breeze that brushes his cheek, I want to be the only thing he needs, wants, desires and loves in life. I want him to love me and me alone.

I cannot and will not share him with anyone, be it family, friends or foes. I will not let him even hate someone as that would take some space in his mind. I will not let him live where all his needs are not satisfied by me.

I am foolishly, madly and hopelessly in love with him. But people say it is an obsession. You tell me obsession it is or love?

All I ask him is to love me and let me love him, day after day, night after night. Is it too much to ask that you call it an obsession?

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