Saturday, March 03, 2007

Can a man and a woman be “just” friends?

my answer is “why not?”, most of you around will answer no way…

per me, guy and a girl are two people and can be best of friends without having romantic feelings…friendship does not have anything to do with you being from same or opposite sex, friendship for me only means that you get along, hit it off and you care…

if I care for someone, I don’t train my brain to feel differently for a guy or a girl, all my brain…no my heart understands is that it feels for this person, I guess heart is typically sex blind to begin with…brain may understand the difference though…right…I think I am getting somewhere, let me rethink…

if you are ruled by mind and manage relationships – you see the difference, but if you are ruled by heart to drive relationships – you don’t see the difference…I guess this is the answer…

think of kids, they play in the playground, not worrying if half of them are in frocks or shorts, all they know is to slide down the slide, or catch some one quickly at hide and seek, may be coz their minds do not know the sex difference yet…as they grow they are taught about the difference and then brain understands it…so the complications begin…

you might laugh but i feel as strongly for my girlfriends as i can feel for a guy…i have this friend (ex colleague), I am extremely fond of, would get jealous if she mixed too much with other people, I would love to do small things for her, if tissue box on her desk was empty,I would replace it before she knew it was over…happily replaced her in official trips where she did not want to go…got gifts coz I knew she loved to be pampered, when some one got chocolates after travel – I would flick all the bounty’s first and hide it in my drawer – as that was her favourite, I sent million of thanks to God up there when finally she got engaged to her boyfriend… after she left I found a note pad of hers, with notes scribbled from meetings, I picked it up, two years past, I still have it with me, when I miss her - I open it look at her handwriting, touch the scribbled text to feel her again, I simply love her ….ya, now some of you might say "this babe is not straight"…that is exactly my point…why can’t a person truly and selflessly feel for another one without having romantic feelings? Why do you always have to mix it up?

well in here u might give me benefit of doubt, as we both are girls but if I did similar things for a guy…I am sure I will not be spared…and that is what irritates me…why can’t we accept that a girl can genuinely care for a guy without any romance in it – or vice verca…like I do for my friend mentioned above… why can't the world accept if I felt similarly for a guy?

why do you have to doubt the intentions if i care? why do you think i feel for you not the way a friend does but the way a girl would? why can't i feel happy to see you happy? what is wrong if i say you are special? why do you think i expect something in return? why i ask...why?

i am just being me, let me be...i ask nothing from you, i demand nothing from you, i expect nothing from you...

2 comments:

Justin said...

most people's conception of emotion is simplistic: love is love, though there are different varieties. Compare the love you feel for your parents to the love you feel for your husband, and your best friend, and your pet dog, etc etc... they're all different. If you understand how to tell the difference between different kinds of love, then it's easy to be 'just friends'...

Pranav G said...

oooh so many whys. I can understnd d relationship, infact i hav evn been thru such kinds(1 of thm u hav read alrdy). Ppl shud think beyond a-boy-&-a-girl-can-only-br-frnds myth, thanks 2 our hindi movies. e.g: Kuch kuch hota hai...Ppl r gr8ly impacted bcoz of d muvis dey watch. I think dat mayb 1 of many reasons why ppl (leave aside d mature audience) dont think abt such relationships.